The other day I came across Avery playing with her princess dolls in her room. It is important to note that she has become very animated and vocal, as she likes to narrate every move or even carry the dialogue of multiple characters in her fairytale re-enactments or original material. In this scene, I overheard infighting in Cinderella’s castle and witnessed Snow White getting kicked to the curb – Heathers style (or Pretty in Pink or Mean Girls pending your generation). I believe the sequence was as follows:“Get out of here Snow White,” scorned Sleeping Beauty. “You go find your own castle.”
And then a voice over brought the act to close with these final words: “Snow White looked back at her once BFFs only to see Arial, Belle and Jasmine standing arms crossed and nodding in agreement with their newly elected Queen Bee. Only Cinderella made eye contact, a final attempt at companionship stemming from her own marginalized past, but she too could not fight the dark side and hung tight with her sorority sisters, eventually giving them the grip and snickering a joke about how Miss Songbird should just got to prom with Duckie."
Ok … maybe a bit dramatic, but the scene sunk in a few days later when 1) I realized this is only 10 years away and I wouldn’t want Avery playing the part any of the roles mentioned above, and 2) I saw Alex leave her behind when he went on a play date – one with no moms, siblings, fancy coffee drinks or parks ... just the kind where you open the door and let him run down the street. With that, Avery stood confused, rejected and left out, sobbing on the front porch for a solid 30 minutes. My explanation and sales pitch that this meant even more one-on-one time with mommy didn’t even matter. She was the younger sibling left behind and it hurt, and therefore, it was a bit painful for me, as well.
Ok … maybe a bit dramatic, but the scene sunk in a few days later when 1) I realized this is only 10 years away and I wouldn’t want Avery playing the part any of the roles mentioned above, and 2) I saw Alex leave her behind when he went on a play date – one with no moms, siblings, fancy coffee drinks or parks ... just the kind where you open the door and let him run down the street. With that, Avery stood confused, rejected and left out, sobbing on the front porch for a solid 30 minutes. My explanation and sales pitch that this meant even more one-on-one time with mommy didn’t even matter. She was the younger sibling left behind and it hurt, and therefore, it was a bit painful for me, as well.
So I guess I better figure out the right words of comfort, PR spin or special treat to ease this pain (for Avery and I), because Alex is only going to continue to grow, move on and be on step ahead, and even those her age are probably not going to discover the power of inclusiveness until way after the junior high years. I know I have a while on the later, but any and all advice is welcome.
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